08 March 2008

This Post Has Been Censored for Reasons of National Security

You may be asking, huh? Unfortunately I do not want to jeopardize my chances of obtaining a Top Secret Security clearance. Sorry readers. I can provide an example that may shed some light on the matter though.

The CIA Polygraph
During the 1980's (and perhaps today) an interesting phenomenon existed at an inauspicious coke machine inside a building with the words, "Ye shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free", splayed across the entranceway. (That would be CIA headquarters.) The coke machine had a habit of building a collection of coins on the top of the machine. The machine would spit out change after a purchase, and on occasion, an individual would forget the coinage leaving it inadvertently for the next buyer. Now stealing is wrong. You buy a coke, go to take your change and find some extra nickels. Lucky day or possible way to fail The Wire? Better leave the ten cents on top of the machine. And soon enough, a decent amount of money builds up. Ahh, fear of the polygraph. And how has it held me down? Playing Spin the Bottle. The Military has Don't ask don't tell. The CIA has no such formal policy though informally does not accept gay people I hear. Better be safe and make the dude kiss me on the cheek. Don't want to be a kill joy but also don't want to be out a job.

So yes, unfortunately this post has been censored for reasons of National Security (or maybe my job security).

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